Keeping It Tight

I fully expected some swelling later in pregnancy, but I never imagined my feet would swell to proportions better suited to a Cabbage Patch Doll. I tried soaking them, putting them up, but nothing made a dent or still does so at the recommendation of a friend, I turned to compression socks.

My legs and feet are still swollen, but the compression socks help to minimize the swelling. Or they just push the fluid elsewhere. I’m not really sure anymore.

Putting them on is a huge challenge every morning and once they’re on, that’s it. I’m sometimes tempted to leave them on overnight but that goes against my firm beliefs in airing out of feet so usually I have P help me strip them off in the evening. Since I’m wearing them in uniform, I went for conservative colors so that way when they show it’s not embarrassing trying to explain why my socks are patterned or hot pink or something like that. Though I already feel pretty ridiculous-looking in my maternity uniform as it is, I’d like to at least pretend I have some control over my appearance.

Compression sock tip: Measure your calves! Either use a piece of string or a soft measuring tape. I gained at least an inch in each calf with pregnancy and it makes a difference when buying socks.

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  1. CEP Women’s Performance Recovery+ Socks// $50// I bought these and the 2XU socks at my local Fleet Feet because I was desperate for something to help my feet fit into shoes again. My biggest complaint with them is that because my calves are swollen and huge, the foot size doesn’t quite fit me and they have extra room in the foot and toe, which invariably my body fills with fluid and tissue. I couldn’t find the exact model I bought, but mine aren’t solid black and have a hot pink section that runs around the heel. It wouldn’t be a problem with normal shoes, but I was wearing Converse sneakers last week and sometimes the pink would peek out.
  2. 2XU Women’s Compression Performance Run Sock// $49.95// I also bought these at Fleet Feet. They’re not bad at all and very comfortable and not that difficult to put on. I also like that they’re solid black so I don’t have to worry about showing any funny colors.
  3. Zoot Women’s Ultra 2.0 CRX Socks// $12.95// The price isn’t a joke, they’re really that affordable, though I did have to go up a size because of my monster calves. They’re more expensive at other sizes so it really depends on how big your calves are. These are probably my favorite socks of the bunch, and not just because of the price. They are super comfortable and tight, but also a complete bear to put on. I timed myself last week and it took me six and a half minutes to put on both socks, including breaks because putting on compression socks when you’re over eight months pregnant is no joke. It’s more like a workout.

Things No One Tells You About Being Pregnant

And probably because if they did, you’d think a little harder about whether you wanted to do this. I probably still would have, but more of a warning would have been nice. You read all sorts of things about other sports, hitting the wall in the marathon, open water swim panic, but there is no one there to tell you about the things your body will do while pregnant.

I definitely am not a pro. I’m a first time mom (FTM lingo for all the baby boards I’m now subbed to), but STILL.


  • It might just be my doctor, but every time there’s a new complaint the answer is not ibuprofen, drink water, and change your socks as I’ve been conditioned to expect by the Army, but instead “let’s do some labs” which means I get to go down and wait in the lab for them to draw more blood and sometimes provide a urine sample. I’m in the third trimester, I don’t remember the last time I’ve seen my “undercarriage” except in a mirror. The other day I had to provide a urine sample, no big because I pee every 10 minutes anyway, but since I couldn’t see what I was doing, I also peed all over my hand. PREGNANCY.


  •  Speaking of pee, I’ve been religiously doing my kegels and anything remotely rumored to help. It didn’t stop me from peeing a little when I sneezed a couple months ago.


  • Do you know what GBS is? I sure didn’t. Apparently it’s Group B strep. Why this matters is because something like 25% of all women have it. It’s no big except it can kill your baby, and also the way they test for this is to swab your vagina and/or rectum. Since this is the Army, you can guess what they swab.


  • I really think there’s a crew of vampires employed by the hospital with all the blood tests they require. Right off the bat I think I provided something like five vials of blood, for what, I have no idea but they didn’t tell me the baby’s sex which would have made it all worth it. And then I still had to get more labs done for a HIV test even though I have an updated one from two years ago and the only person I’m making babies with is my husband who you know, also has an updated HIV test. But you know what? I did it again because in the State of Georgia there is apparently a HIV threat and if your baby comes out with any sort of possible illness, they will immediately start that baby on antiretrovirals. Of course, it’s entirely possible I could somehow get HIV between that test and my baby’s birth, but we won’t talk about that.


  • How about no one warns you about the lack of sleep WHILE pregnant? I love sleep. I miss sleep. I expected this after the baby but not while she’s still cooking. This would be fine except I can’t chug coffee like I used to.


  • Pregnancy-induced carpal tunnel syndrome is a thing and it sucks. I work with computers for a living but also you sort of need hands to do every day things like pull covers up, do your hair, wipe yourself after using the toilet.



  • On the plus side, I feel like universally everyone is just nicer to pregnant ladies. I like the parking spaces up front at stores and how people are just generally kinder to pregnant women. I was craving a tall juice from Panera one day at breakfast after drinking all my hot cocoa and the cashier just let me have it for free. Day. Made. At this point, I am also appreciative of people letting me have a seat when space is limited and moving out of my way in narrow spaces because I don’t have much proprioception anymore, judging by the bruises on my thighs and also all the food that gets dropped on my shirt on a daily basis.


  • It’s hard to tell but I could also swear that my pets love me more. I say it’s hard to tell because due to my shift work, I’m able to spend more time with them than I used to and they seem to be slightly preferring me over my husband (with the exception of my cat who can’t help that he’s a jerk because he’s a cat). Sometimes it’s a little overwhelming but mostly I love having extra-cuddly dogs.

All in all, it’s not the worst thing ever but I really don’t think I fully understood what I was signing up for along the way. I don’t think it would have stopped me from wanting to have kids, but I think I could have been better informed.

Spinning Babies?

I wrote a couple of entries ago about some of the more labor-focused exercises my doula was having me do. She also referred me to a site called Spinning Babies, which is not at all like the Exorcist scene I pictured of babies with their heads spinning around. Instead, it’s a compendium of exercises designed to position babies optimally for labor as well as help strengthen the pelvic floor for birth.


For me, I’m interested in it because it claims that it can help ease back labor, avoid c-sections, and decrease the labor time even for first time moms. Possibly best of all hardly any of the exercises require any equipment and mostly use bodyweight to achieve its goals. I also really like workouts with point to them – one of the reasons I have a hard time with free form cardio workouts as opposed to lifting.

The site goes over all the exercises with clear pictures, but they also offer videos for a fee if workout videos are more of your thing. I feel pretty comfortable with my current range of exercises, but it’s fun to read about others and what else I can do even in late pregnancy to help my baby get into an optimal birthing position and also reduce fatigue for myself in labor.


2018 Goals

I love setting goals and also making lists just so I can check things off of them. It’s so satisfying. Resolution goals are really my jam. Over the years I’ve gotten better at goal-setting and making things intentional and realistic as opposed to just saying I’ll do more of something or less of something else.

For 2018, my goals are a little different than in years past.

ONE // I want to try to make it to breastfeeding for six months

A year would be better, but I’m not even remotely in control of my work schedule and there’s a chance I might be on a long work trip this time next year, so I’m trying to make flexible goals as well. I really would like to meet this one, if only because breastmilk is free and formula is so expensive.

TWO // Pass my postpartum APFT

I have six months after giving birth to take the Army Physical Fitness Test which I’ve never had an issue passing before, but I’ve also never given birth before and never weighed as much as I do now. I already feel slightly stressed and panicky at the thought of trying to drop all this baby weight and get back into shape in six short months.

THREE // Study for and pass the CompTIA CISSP exam

Every year I try to do something to professionally improve myself. I almost failed in 2017 because I got busy with a major training exercise at the beginning of the year and then moving and learning an entire new job, bur fortunately my job enrolled me in a two-week course so I got some professional training I otherwise would not have gotten. I’ve been respectful of the CISSP test for years and a little intimidated by the breadth of knowledge it tests which also makes it difficult to study for.

FOUR // Finish the Augusta Ironman 70.3

This is a rollover from 2017 because I wasn’t comfortable cycling while pregnant. Looking back, I feel like I was overly concerned and probably would have been just fine, but it’s my first rodeo so I’m trying to be forgiving of myself as well. I’m also hoping this will give me some motivation for passing the APFT as well.

FIVE // Get back down to my pre-pregnancy weight

I don’t actually know if I can do this in a year, but I want to put this down because it is still a goal. I was at a healthy weight before I got pregnant but my body really loves being pregnant and was more than happy to pack on the pounds, so much so that we thought I might actually have gestational diabetes (I didn’t, which was both a relief and a discouragement because then at least I’d have a reason for why I blew up so much). This is also probably my vainest goal of the bunch so I won’t be too hard on myself if I don’t achieve it by the end of 2018 as long as I’ve made some progress in dropping the weight.